A 28-year-woman on Facebook with three or four kids or whatever who was happy five minutes ago has now sensationally returned to being PISSED OFF and incredibly upset without actually giving solid details about what has induced this sudden change in life outlook.
At 6pm on Sunday evening, Clarabel Fatuous-Knight from Fairfax Drive posted an image on Facebook or her three or four children or whatever with the caption ‘I am so lucky to have these kids in my live even without their dads around at all I love you all so much xxxxx :)’
However, at 6.05pm, a text-only post appeared on Clarabel’s wall that gave the impression that she was on the verge of firmly inserting her head in an oven or going on some sort of Hollywood-style killing spree.
She wrote: ‘I am so angry right now I could kill you know who you are I can’t say who you are cos this is Facebook but you will have karma in some shape or form I can’t say anymore because I am not a spitefool and vengeful person but you you know you are I don’t need you and people like you around me and mah kids.’
The post was followed by eleven different inspirational memes about it people just needing to be themselves and not having to worry about the opinions of others – basically the fundamental principle of why Facebook was invented in the first fucking place.
A spokesperson for Essex Police said that they were unable to intervene as no threat to public safety had been identified.
He added: ‘Our cyber monitoring team picks up around 25,000 local posts per day on this level. If every threat of Facebook rage was taken seriously we’d have to convert Canvey Island into a penal colony.’